E4BH and the Tanned One

 Due to the unprecedented success of E4BH’s political interviews, she has graciously accepted a request by Governor Charlie Crist’ office to interview the tanned one.  The transcript of their conversation appears below.

E4BH:  Keep in mind Governor Bronze that you asked for this interview and I intend to ask you some tough questions.  And thanks for making the trip to Tallahassee Memorial.

C.C.:  No problem. 

The name is Crist and I will be happy to answer any questions that you may have.

E4BH:  What’s up with this year round tan?  Are you afraid to show your pasty white skin?

C.C.:  Truth be told, like Obama I am the product of an interracial marriage.  My mother is white and my father is the bronze statue of Neptune.

E4BH:  So your daddy is like king of the tuna fish?

C.C.:  Actually he was the God of the seas!

E4BH:  So that makes you royalty?

C.C.:  I guess so…..

E4BH:  You guess so?  Shouldn’t the Governor of the state of Florida know more than I guess so?  Are you ashamed of your daddy?

C.C.:  C’mon, after all he was a bronze statue.

E4BH:   I feel your pain.  My daddy was a John Deere tractor.  Not!  Do you plan on being McCain’s running mate?

C.C.:  I am the Governor of the state of Florida and I have not been asked.  So it is not an option at this point. 

E4BH:  Then what was the point of your quickie engagement?

C.C.:  I just felt that the time was right.

E4BH:  Whatever!  You probably knocked her up and I am an expert on this because I have been knocked up before!

C.C.:  That’s between me and my fiancée.

E4BH:  Shut up!  It better be between you and God you heathen.  I was innocent when I got knocked up!

C.C.:  How so E4BH?

E4BH:  See the ring around my finger moron?  Just how did you get elected anyway?

C.C.:  By the majority of voters.

E4BH:  Take off your shirt golden boy!

C.C.:  I beg your pardon?

E4BH:  You heard me Governor McDreamy!  I want to see if you’re tanned all over.

C.C.:  Hold on one second please.

E4BH:  Just who are you calling?

C.C.:  My security detail.


Editors Note:  E4BH ripped of the Governor’s shirt and was last seen skipping down Centerville Rd.  For his part, the Governor mumbled to himself that he should have listened to his communication’s director.



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Filed under Humor and Satire

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