There’s an old saying about sperm: “Last one in is a rotten egg, first one in is daddy!”
Here at the Associated Mess, we take societal matters very seriously, including birth control. In fact, the Associated Mess highly recommends the use of condoms during sexual activity. Not so much as a matter to prevent a sexually transmitted disease, but rather to prevent the birth of a child that will for the rest of your life be more aggravating than a scorching case of The Clap could ever be.
Click the link below to see how you can keep from being the proud parents of the next Osama bin-Laden or Adolph Hitler. I’m personally waiting on the George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, and Rush Limbaugh editions. They’d never fit and would probably break every time you would use one so I am not holding my breath! Not to be sexist, I also propose an Ann Coulter condom; nothing says keep your dick in your pants louder than a bitch who just might be Hitler’s secret frozen love child.