Tag Archives: birth control

Contraception!

Photo via The Arizona Republic

Religious freedom my ass… The assault on women’s rights is so laughable that each and every Republican who voted for the Blunt/Rubio amendment should be voted out of Congress when their time comes. I am so glad that it was defeated yesterday.   This amendment served two purposes; the first, to eventually repeal Roe vs. Wade, the second, to weaken The Affordable Health Care Act.  The very idea to allow insurance companies to determine what they will or will not pay for is ludicrous.  I’ve never met an insurance company that wanted to pay any claim.

Let’s touch on two topics regarding the Catholic Church!  Both are Church Dogma that serve insidious purposes.  First, is “chaste” amongst the Catholic Clergy.  The only reason that Catholic priests are not allowed to marry or have sex is because the early Church did not want claims against its property by the offspring of its Priests.  What has that line of thinking gotten us?  An international child abuse sex ring spanning centuries.

The second reason is contraception.  Why would the Catholic Church endorse a policy of contraception when that policy means fewer Catholics?  The Pope wants all the tithers that he can get.  What has this line of thinking gotten us?  The likes of Rick Santorum and his 187 children that will propagate this outdated line of thinking for centuries to come.  We don’t need 20 children anymore to work the farm…

The Constitution of the United States of America, as far as I know, does not make any exceptions for religious liberty.  As long as no law makes a direct attack on religion, there is no legal argument to be made against Obama care and his insistence that the insurance companies foot the bill for contraceptives.

How ironic is it that the Republicans will fight tooth and nail for you to be born, and then have no regard for you once you get here.  The hypocrisy  is not lost upon me, and neither should it be upon you…

I am so happy to live in a country where these arguments can be made and won or lost in the halls of Congress.  But more so, for a President, that is not afraid to do the right thing.  Every woman in America should support a man that has their best interests in his heart.  For you to do otherwise, I have a choice adjective for you…

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Filed under Health, Politics, Society

Thwart That Evil Hitler Sperm!

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There’s an old saying about sperm:  “Last one in is a rotten egg, first one in is daddy!”

Here at the Associated Mess, we take societal matters very seriously, including birth control.  In fact, the Associated Mess highly recommends the use of condoms during sexual activity.  Not so much as a matter to prevent a sexually transmitted disease, but rather to prevent the birth of  a child that will for the rest of your life be more aggravating than a scorching case of The Clap could ever be.

Click the link below to see how you can keep from being the proud parents of the next Osama bin-Laden or Adolph Hitler.  I’m personally waiting on the George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, and Rush Limbaugh editions.  They’d never fit and would probably break every time you would use one so I am not holding my breath!  Not to be sexist, I also propose an Ann Coulter condom; nothing says keep your dick in your pants louder than a bitch who just might be Hitler’s secret frozen love child.

http://adweek.blogs.com/adfreak/2009/04/use-a-condom-thwart-that-evil-hitler-sperm.html

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Filed under Business, Humor and Satire