Tag Archives: Religion

Miracle?

“There are only two ways to live your life.  One is as though nothing is a miracle.  The other is as though everything is a miracle.” – Albert Einstein

I have not always been the evil Atheist that some people make me out to be.  In fact, I was indoctrinated into religion at an early age by my grandmother Thelma Clarke.  Thelma, or T.C. as we like to call her, made it her business to see that her grandchildren were raised as good little Episcopalians.  Every Sunday, my brother, sisters, and I served Christ as acolytes, singing in the children’s choir, and attending Sunday school.

It was during these Sunday School classes that I was first introduced to the concept of miracles.  Dictionary.com defines a miracle as:  an effect or extraordinary event in the physical world that surpasses all known human or natural powers and is ascribed to a supernatural cause.  Supernatural is used usually as an euphemism for God.  Along my own personal journey through this short thing that we call life, I came to be a skeptic of miracles and the supernatural.  For me, logic and reason control my thought processes.  I have to be able to see and touch something in order to believe that it exists.  If you will, I need empirical evidence…

That was until today when Devyn walked across the threshold and I was able to touch him and hug him for the first time since his shooting.  It was in that instant that all of T.C.’s making me go to church came back to haunt me.  I was at once grateful for the turn of events that allowed Devyn to come home.  I am talking about the incompetence of his attackers and grateful for the angle of the bullet that entered his head.  Logic tells me that he is fortunate to be alive because of his will to live and the way that the event unfolded.

What I am having difficulty with is discounting the prayers and well wishes of all of you that have come to support Devyn and my family as we deal with this tragedy.  I can’t very well tell you to take your “God bless you and your family” and that “We are praying for him” and tell you to blow it out of your asses because I don’t know if it was that, in effect,  that saved him.

There is no proof that God exists or does not exist! I suspect that this argument will continue when we have all ceased to exist.  The only thing that I know is that when I saw my nephew today, I was overjoyed and filled with a feeling of love that I didn’t know that resided within me.  Was it just life playing  itself  out?  Or was it just a miracle?

Today, I don’t care what anyone believes.  Be it in a supernatural being or a miracle that brought Devyn home or a total act of randomness of the physical  universe is irrelevant.  I am a happy man!  This is a time for celebration.  Whether his being home is a miracle or just plain fate is a debate for someone who gives a shit.  And right now, I dont…

P.S.  While Devyn is growing stronger physically, we have yet to discover the psychological issues that he will have to deal with.  As always, the family continues to appreciate your love and support.  We will continue to update you with Devyn’s recovery!  Peace and love to all!

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Catholic Sex Scandal! Or Leave No Child’s Behind.

As Christians get ready to celebrate, perhaps their most holiest of days, I am reminded of the resurrection of Jesus Christ and all that it entails.  Forgiveness of sins. Everlasting life for those who are saved through him.  And all of that is good if you believe in that kind of stuff.  But I wonder whether or not there is forgiveness and everlasting life awaiting those Catholic Priests that have raped and tortured innocent children over the centuries?

This ridiculous dogma of celibacy and not allowing priest to marry is denying man of one of his most powerful and basic instincts.  Priests need to eat also but I don’t see any edict banning the consumption of food.  The two rules were instituted for two reasons, first, to have sex with a woman was considered to make a man unclean and if you’re dirty, you really can’t serve God can you?  Secondly, and by far more importantly, the ban against marriage was to keep heirs from making any claims against church property.  Damn if the Pope was going to give up one of his golden candle sticks.

I am not qualified to comment on the psychological problems that these restrictions have on their actions.  But one could reasonably assume that by denying themselves of their basic needs could manifest some deviant behavior.  Now that this deviant behavior is coming into the light again and the Pope has been implicated in the cover up, you have more denials coming out the Vatican than a Republican Senator caught in an airport bathroom.  When the Vatican starts comparing the accusations against Benedict to Anti-Semitism you know the wheel is about to come off.  What’s even worse is that as an institution, the Catholic Church has a long history of Anti-Semitic behavior.

The only way to save what little integrity the Church has left is for Pope Benedict to resign and make public the names of all abusive priests and turn their names over to the civilian authorities.  They may also want to adopt the practices of the Eastern Catholic Church which allows their priests to marry.  The rape and torture of defenseless children must stop.  The Holy See needs to open his eyes and do the right thing.

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News You Can’t Use! Muslim Style

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 I am an equal opportunity Atheist and I take on all religions.  So no fatwas please!

I was wondering if the prophet Mohammad lived a long life or did those who followed him kill him because he was an actual visual representation of himself?

I like the idea that if I blow myself up committing Jihad that I will get 72 virgins in Paradise.  What I don’t like is the idea of getting jiggy with my virgins with Allah in the house.  And if I were in Paradise, what the hell would I need virgins for?  Anyway I propose a new set of rules.  Before I blow myself up, I want my 72 virgins (providing that you could find that many) up front, six months leave, and a couple of bottles of Viagra.  At the end of the six months, if the 72 deflowered women haven’t already killed me, I’ll strap on the dynamite vest just to get the hell away from them.

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This is taking the Burka to a whole new level.  If the women of the Muslim world dressed like this, I’d probably bow down and pray five times a day too.  Mecca, here I come!  This is one pilgrimage I’d be happy to make.

Hey look! I’ve got nothing agaisnt Islam.  Religions have their place and control the masses in every society.  My only hope is that I do not catch a piece of C-4 up my six.  Can’t we all learn to just get along!

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Filed under Humor and Satire, Religion

Ready for War!

 

I point out racism wherever it rears it ugly head!  http://www.splcenter.org/intel/intelreport/article.jsp?aid=941

BALTIMORE — Despite the hellish heat on this spring Saturday morning in gritty West Baltimore, the five Hebrew Israelite priests loitering near a West Franklin Street storefront are draped in heavy robes, and their heads are wrapped in matching white, red and black cloths. Star of David emblems swing from their necklaces and are embroidered into their fabrics. One priest holds a staff.Around them, security guards wear black headscarves, black T-shirts and black military-style pants tucked into combat boots. They grip cell phones and billy clubs. On their belts are sheaths and holsters, some empty, others holding blades and guns. The guards flit back and forth across the street, between the parking lot of an apartment complex that police say is notorious for drug-related crimes and a building with covered windows and a bolted front door. 

Behind that locked door is the Baltimore branch of the Israelite Church of God in Jesus Christ, a black supremacist sect headquartered in New York City. Obsessed with hatred for whites and Jews, the leaders of the Israelite Church have managed to build up 29 church branches in recent years.They are not alone.Around the country, thousands of men and women have joined black supremacist groups on the extremist fringe of the Hebrew Israelite movement, a black nationalist theology that dates back to the 19th century. Its doctrine asserts that African Americans are God’s true chosen people because they, not the people known to the world today as Jews, are the real descendants of the Hebrews of the Bible. Although most Hebrew Israelites are neither explicitly racist nor anti-Semitic and do not advocate violence, there is a rising extremist sector within the Hebrew Israelite movement whose adherents believe that Jews are devilish impostors and who openly condemn whites as evil personified, deserving only death or slavery.The notorious white supremacist leader Tom Metzger once remarked of extremist Hebrew Israelites, “They’re the black counterparts of us.” The belief system of extremist Hebrew Israelites is basically the reversed-color mirror image of the Christian Identity theology embraced by many white supremacists, which holds that mainstream Jews are the descendants of Satan and that white people are the chosen ones, divinely endowed by God with superior status over “mud people,” believers’ term for non-white individuals. 

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Priests of the Israelite Church of God in Jesus Christ preach a particularly virulent form of Hebrew Israelism.

Since 2000, when the prophecy of a key leader failed to materialize (he predicted Christ would return to Earth at the dawn of the new millennium to wreak bloody vengeance on white people), the rhetoric of extremist Hebrew Israelites sects has been steadily heating up, with increasing talk of an impending apocalypse and God-ordained race war. At the same time, a magnetic young leader, who counts among his disciples the lead singer of a top-selling R&B group, emerged and rapidly expanded a movement that was previously concentrated in black inner-city neighborhoods on the East Coast. There are now extremist Hebrew Israelite churches in cities throughout Florida, Maryland, Minnesota, Missouri, Nebraska, New Jersey, North Carolina, Pennsylvania, Oklahoma and Oregon.

Confrontations between Hebrew Israelite street preachers and their perceived enemies are growing uglier and gaining increasing attention through video clips circulated to legions of viewers on websites like YouTube. The Israelite School of Universal Practical Knowledge, a sect that is the Israelite Church’s main rival, has its own YouTube “channel,” or video sharing distribution networks, with over 500 subscribers. One recently circulated Israelite School video, which has been viewed more than 26,000 times, shows a group of robed street preachers harassing a white woman until she bursts into tears. Another shows the preachers applauding as a white man kneels down to kiss the boots of “the prophets of God” while begging forgiveness for the sins of his race.

In yet another video, a preacher of the Israelite School, a man who identifies himself as General Mayakaahla Ka, offers this stark prediction for the future of the white race: “Every white person who doesn’t get killed by Christ when he returns is going into slavery!”

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Baltimore: The Grilling
The streets of the West Baltimore neighborhood where the Israelite Church sanctuary is located are just as tough as they look on HBO’s “The Wire,” a cops-and-reporters crime series acclaimed for its realistic insights into urban life. In the middle of this scene, passersby on Franklin Street respectfully acknowledge the Israelite Church priests and their black-clad security men. These local residents would have no problem getting into the nightly classes that Israelite Church teachers offer in public libraries throughout Baltimore.But the mysterious church here is different. Entry to its Saturday “Sabbath” sessions requires a vigorous and often intimidating screening.

First, there’s the question of skin tone; those with European ancestry need not apply. Others — and, lately, Hebrew Israelites have come to include West Indians, Latin Americans, and American Indians as brother “Hebrews” — may approach security for entry. Any stranger must meet certain strict conditions.

You must promise the guards that you are “clean” — that you haven’t eaten pork or had sex in the prior 24 hours. You must explain how you learned about the church and why you’ve chosen to attend. You must assure guards that you’re not a law enforcement officer or a spy from a rival Hebrew Israelite group, and then you have to give up your photo identification. Any recording device will be confiscated during an aggressive pat down search carried out by the guards.

When the door is unbolted briefly to allow you into the building, you walk into a tiny vestibule where you’re required to enter your name, address and telephone number into a ledger. If you have a cell phone, it will be confiscated and stored in a file cabinet until you leave. You will be issued a King James Version of the Bible — and any other version that you may carry will be taken away.

Finally, a disciple approaches. He pours olive oil on your head as a final cleansing measure. Now, at last, you are prepared to enter the inner sanctum.

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Lynching Santa
“I’m talking about 99 million niggers! You talking about 6 million crackers?”General Mayakaahla Ka is shouting at a college-aged Jewish kid outside the Market East Station in downtown Philadelphia. He and three other extremist Hebrew Israelite preachers, all wearing the Israelite School insignia of two swords crossed through a Star of David, berate their victim until he begins to weep. The altercation is part of an Israelite School recruiting video that began circulating this spring and has since been viewed more than 73,000 times.

“Are you saying the Holocaust is a joke?” the Jewish man asks.

“It’s a joke!” the “general” responds. “The Holocaust is a damn joke! Heil Hitler!”

Mobile clusters of up to a dozen extremist Hebrew Israelite street preachers, known in the movement as “camps,” have become a common presence at busy intersections, plazas and public transportation centers in large American cities, especially in Philadelphia, New York, Baltimore and Washington, D.C., as well as Venice, Calif. The camps are often remarkably aggressive and intimidating, railing against “white devils” and calling for death for Jews and homosexuals.

Zacharyah ben Ya’aqov, a former racist Hebrew Israelite who was active in the movement in the 1990s, calls the activities of camps “evangelical terrorizing.” Ya’aqov, who now heads the Israelite group, The Truth After Knowledge, denounces his former community’s racist doctrines. He describes on his group’s website his experiences as a rank-and-file member, explaining that his superiors brainwashed new recruits, using “fear tactics to break you down,” and instructed followers to join camps and verbally assault pedestrians. “They [camp preachers] told them [targeted passersby] they had hell to pay and would be going into slavery,” Ya’aqov says on his Web forum. “Especially the white man, who they had special hatred for.”

The Israelite School caused a major stir recently when it positioned a camp at the bustling intersection of H and 8th streets in the Capitol Hill neighborhood of northeast Washington, D.C.. The noise produced through its preachers’ megaphones and amplifiers sparked conflicts with those who live in the area. “It’s frightening when a person or group can force noise — whatever the speech content — inside another’s home,” said Capitol Hill resident David Klavitter, who monitors the Israelite School camps for his Quest for Quiet blog. “This allows amplifiers to be used as weapons to harass, intimidate and threaten people.”

Last December, the Israelite School observed the holidays by “lynching” effigies of the Virgin Mary and Santa Claus in Klavitter’s neighborhood.

Extremist Hebrew Israelites have a long, strange list of enemies. At the top of the list are white people, who they preach are descended from a race of red, hairy beings, known as Edomites, who were spawned by Esau, the twin brother of Jacob (later known as Israel) in the Old Testament. Equally hated are “fraudulent” Jews, “the synagogue of Satan.” They’re closely followed in no particular order by Asians, promiscuous black women, abortionists, continental Africans (who, according to the extremist Israelites, sold the lost tribes of Israel, who were black, to European slave traders), and homosexuals, who according to extremist Israelites should all be put to death. (In December 2006, three gay men who were assaulted inside an Atlanta nightclub identified their attackers as Hebrew Israelites; no arrests were made).

Recruiting literature describing the extremist Israelite doctrine is just as harsh as the street preachers’ angry rhetoric. “Does the Bible teach unity of races? NO!” reads one of the Israelite Church’s widely distributed fliers. “Will the different nations who believe in Jesus be saved from the Lord’s wrath? NO! Was Jesus Christ a Caucasian man? NO! Does his color matter? YES!”

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Baltimore: The Sanctuary
Paintings of a black “Yahawah,” or Jesus, adorn the walls of the sanctuary inside the Baltimore storefront Israelite Church, along with images of dark-skinned angels. The room is long, narrow and windowless. There are metal and wood folding chairs set up in 12 rows of six each. The first six rows are reserved for men, while women are relegated to the back. The walls are lined with posters bearing the names and images of the 12 tribes of Israel and the nations who are believed to represent each of those tribes today. The biblical tribe of Judah, for instance, is said to be the forbear of today’s African Americans, while those of Levi and Benjamin are believed to have become the Haitians and West Indians of the present.At the head of the sanctuary is an altar adorned with coiled horns made of wood and metal candelabras. Just behind the altar, atop a slightly raised stage, is a table covered in cloth. Behind that are two royal-blue curtains, each embroidered with Hebrew characters. (Israelite Church members, like members of other Hebrew Israelite groups, routinely use “Hebrew” names rather than their legal names.)

A member of the audience announces the three priests who will preside today, and the men, clad in extravagant robes and staffs, rise from the front seats. They take their seats at the table behind the altar, and one of them sounds the coiled horn.

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“General Mayakaahla Ka,” an Israelite School of Universal Practical Knowledge preacher, regularly shouts down whites, Jews and other enemies in street confrontations.

This Sabbath’s teaching, from the Book of Chronicles, is read out by one of the high priests. Then another, whose real name is Carlos Santiago, interprets the words for his audience. As usual, the sermon focuses on the perfidy of white people — or, in the language that Santiago appropriates from the Bible, how God restores power to Judah (read: black Israelites) and punishes Edom (white people) with death.

“The army of Judah also captured 10,000 men alive, took them to the top of a cliff and threw them down so that all were dashed to pieces,” one priest reads. Then Santiago steps up to explain how this is a reference to black Israelite power. “See how powerful Judah is?” he says. “This is the kind of power we have over them.”

Aching for Armageddon
The man with the most power over the extremist Hebrew Israelite movement is Jermaine Grant, 30, the head of the Israelite Church of God in Jesus Christ. Grant rose from the lower levels of the organization to become its top leader in 2000. This was after Christ failed to return to earth to slay or enslave all Edomites, as had been long prophesied by Grant’s predecessor, Ahrayah, the movement’s founding “godfather.”It was a period of great tumult within the extremist Israelite world. Many of Ahrayah’s high-ranking followers split off to form their own new factions, while inside the Israelite Church organization, Grant’s star ascended just as rapidly as Ahrayah’s fell. A former rap music label owner and restaurateur, Grant is a highly charismatic figure. Although his “Hebrew” name is Tazadaqyah, his title is “Chief High Priest”; he is also sometimes referred to by followers as the Holy Spirit made flesh. Today, he can be seen in numerous YouTube videos preaching to gatherings of hundreds and typically dressed in shiny silk robes and headwraps rendered in blues and purples. He’s often pictured in stretch limos or tour buses emblazoned with his portrait and his nickname — “The Comforter.”

Since 2001, Grant has produced the Arch Angel Awards, a version of the Grammys for musical artists who are avowed loyalists of the Israelite Church. The most famous of them is Wanya Morris, the lead singer of Boys II Men, a popular R&B group that’s won four real Grammys and sold over 60 million records.

According to former members of the church, Grant has instituted mandatory tithes and general offerings from his followers. Also, during his 2006 “I Will Not Leave You Comfortless Tour,” in which he toured six East Coast states in eight weeks, Grant reportedly demanded an additional $25 per attendee in the form of an additional “High Priest offering.” (Another “world tour” is planned later this year.)

Grant, who did not reply to a request for an interview for this article, is an energetic man. Under his leadership, the Israelite Church has expanded rapidly, and its “Hidden Truth” television programming can be seen on public access channels around the country. Meanwhile, the tone of the extremist Hebrew Israelite grows ever more apocalyptic, with its followers feverishly searching for signs of a bloodthirsty black Yahawah’s impending return.

This summer, Grant boldly predicted that a hellish earthquake would soon herald the return of Christ and the beginning of Hebrew Israelite rule. He didn’t set a date, but his prophecy still heightened the mood of eager anticipation for the coming doom of all enemies of the true Israelites. That, coupled with the increasing militance and numbers of his movement, is what is so worrying.

The vision of Grant and his fellow Hebrew Israelite hard-liners — an imminent and bloody demise for whites and other enemies at the hands of a vengeful returning Christ — is well captured in a scene from a 2007 documentary. In one scene from “The Gods of Times Square,” an extremist Hebrew Israelite preacher delivers a sermon with his foot planted on the back of a white man laying flat on the sidewalk, arms splayed at his sides. A second preacher approaches the camera.

“White boy, you’re next,” he warns. “All you white people get ready for war. We’re coming for you, white boys. Negroes are the real Jews. Get ready for war!”

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Some More Buy Bull!

 

Maybe I should have gone to school this semester.  I have way too much time on my hands.  I picked up the Bible for a few minutes just to get a few laughs but what I read today was shocking.  Cain killed his brother Abel and God put Cain into the Lord’s protection plan.  You see, Cain was afraid that since he was now a restless wanderer that somebody might kill him.  And I am sitting here thinking to myself just who in the fuck that might be?  There’s only you and your parents on the face of the earth and I’m pretty damn sure that they wouldn’t kill you.  The thought of losing another child would be overbearing.

So now Cain is banished and moves to the land of Nod east of Eden.  In Nod Cain finds a wife and gets married.  Hold up! Wait a minute!  I am really confused now.  Was there a God of Nod who created His own part of the world and His own first family?  I certainly hope so because if not, then only Adam and Eve could have had another child and that would mean Cain married his sister and that is just plain nasty.

Now I am pissed off to learn that I cannot live to be 930 years old.  I’d like the chance to have children at the age of 500. I could have enough children to vote Obama into office with my progeny alone.  It isn’t fair Big G.  If it’s good enough for Noah, it’s good enough for me.  Why reduce my life span to a mere 120 years?  I would really like to meet my great great great great great great great great great great great great grandsons and daughters.

And what’s with You giving Adam naming rights on woman?  Did he drop you a few shekels?  Why Eve?  I bet that if she had the chance to name herself she would have done so along the lines of Sheniquia or Foxy Brown.  Well I have to go now.  Me and my friend Leprechaun are going to follow that rainbow to that pot of gold.

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Another Religious Question! And Not For Those Easily Offended!

I managed to make it through the book of Genesis yesterday and I now have a new found belief in the Tooth Fairy, the Easter Bunny, and Freddy Kruger!  I really have to wonder why the hell I am majoring in religion?  After 5 straight semesters including summer school I am taking this semester off to do absolutely nothing but try to annoy the right wing in both politics and religion.  Two classes that I have to take eventually are Intro into the Old and New Testaments. Today I am going to read Leviticus.  I think that if I remember correctly, that is the book that doesn’t allow a human being to have any fun.

I made it through Leviticus and let me tell you, it’s a tough read. God is definitely not a member of PETA. Why does an animal have to die for someone else’s sin? There are not enough bullocks, goats, and lambs to go around. Do Christians still engage in this kind of behavior? Did Jimmy Swaggart sacrifice a goat and burn it unto the Lord when he got caught with that hooker?

I think that if I was Moses I would have gone fucking crazy with God in my ear all fucking day long teaching me how to be Martha Stewart. I bet Aaron and Moses’ sons got tired of doing all the dirty work. Hey! That would make Moses the first community organizer. With all of these damned burnt offerings unto the Lord I believe that God was a tad narcissistic.

Now my first question is what does God have against the pig and shellfish? He created them. God was the first practitioner of animal discrimination. Fortunately for the pig, he does not have to worry about becoming a burnt offering. All of you Evangelicals at Sonny’s Bar-B-Que wolfing down those baby back ribs are in big trouble. And all you shrimp and lobster lovers at Red Lobster better keep an eye over your shoulder.

God next’s play is the gender card. Why is a woman unclean for seven days after bearing a male child and unclean for fourteen days after bearing a female child? Oh, I get it. You must still be pissed off over that Eve episode. God, are you a closet misogynist?

God shows his eternal love by hating on lepers! Why make people with leprosy go through that fucked up health care plan? You are God! Cure that shit yourself!

Now I am up to chapter 20 and the shit really starts to hit the fan. If you curse your mother or father you will be put to death. If you fuck your neighbor’s wife they both will be put to death. If you fuck your father’s wife, that makes you a motherfucker and the two of you will be put to death. If you fuck your daughter-in-law the game is over. If you fuck another man you will be put to death. Larry Craig, you’re in a heap of shit pal. If a man or a woman fucks an animal, both the man and woman and the animals would be put to death. C’mon God, that’s not fair to the animals, they could not consent! Okay the laws regarding who you can’t fuck go on and I don’t want a fifty sentence paragraph.  Were there any kind of “get out of death” cards back then?

In chapter 21 God says that you should not take a whore for a wife. What do you have against whores God? They need love too! Besides, they’d probably be a little better in the sack than a virgin. I agree wholeheartedly with you in verse 11, anybody trying to get a piece of pussy from a dead woman, that’s just plain fucking nasty.

At this point I just kind of skimmed through the rest of the book before my brain turned to Jell-O! My second question is this, why do religious conservatives openly hate gays and lesbians? Wait a minute, I don’t remember anything about a woman lying down with another woman being a death sentence. Maybe God doesn’t mind a little girl on girl action.

So where is the outrage against swine and shellfish eaters? Where is the outrage against adulterers? Maybe Moses was crazy when he wrote all of this shit. Or maybe he was just kidding becaused he rolled a fattie and was smoking that primo myrrh!

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A Religious Question!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I was going through some old things and happened to stumble across a Bible that my grandmother gave me after I had been confirmed in the Episcopal Church at the age of 13.  Up until this point I had never opened it up.  Although I was going through the motions, I knew that I did not believe back then and still don’t.  Yes! I am a dreaded Atheist.  But I read the first two chapters of Genesis and I have a couple of questions that I hope someone can answer them.

In chapter 1, verse 26 reads:  And God said, Let us make man in our image…  Who is us and our?

In chapter 1, verse 27 reads:  So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he him.

Now let’s jump ahead to chapter 2.

In chapter 2, verse 21 reads:  And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept:  and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;

In chapter 2, verse 22 reads:  And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

In chapter 2, verse 23 reads:  And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh:  she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of man.

Now my problem is this; didn’t God make woman first in chapter 1 when He was Us and Our? 

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